Wednesday, February 06, 2013

Diving Deeper into Motherhood and Love

The twins will be eight months old next week. I say this with a smile while holding a few silent tears back. Motherhood has been a journey, a challenge, a joy. A string of beautiful moments.

Motherhood has changed me. Shown me greater depths of love, molded me in ways I could never have fathomed. And still I find myself going deeper.

The digging deep started with fighting to bring them into this world. After HELLP syndrome, low platelets and a traumatic labor and delivery it was love that dug deep to find the strength to recover quickly and bring all of us home. A home made up of the mom and dad they both desperately needed to care for them.

Still motherhood said love is deeper. It was the multiple night feedings that lasted for weeks, pulling myself out of bed and ignoring the csection post partum pain to answer the cries of my children. To give the life giving nourishment and human touch they yearned for. Oh what a beautiful gift to be able to provide this.

Love still dove deeper. This time showing how much those around you love you. The love of my husband, parenting as a team. 3am feedings, in the dead of the night, each with a baby in our arms and playing footsie across the nursery in silence to say "I'm in this with you." He says he misses the 3am feedings. It was family coming in, my sister 39!weeks pregnant herself caring for my family. Family driving and flying in. Friends providing countless meals, notes of encouragement and prayers. That's love at 50 feet deep. But it goes deeper.

Most recently, Motherhood revealing to me the depth of love when the entire family is sick at the same time. Cleaning up vomit once, then again, and rising at 5am. But one smile makes you forget it all.

But the love goes even deeper. You think about the gift of your child. And how He gave His to us. And still you see the love goes deeper.

If this is motherhood, I'm diving deeper. Love. 1000 feet under.
Bring it on.

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